You may have heard Tony Robbins say ‘the strongest force in the human personality is the need to be consistent with who we believe we are’…
It’s so true…
I remember many times in my life when I felt I needed to pretend to be someone I wasn’t – particularly at work, but being anything other than yourself is like a pressure cooker…the steam builds and builds until finally the lid can’t hold it anymore and we blow!
This is what often happens when we are not being our true selves…we can keep it up for a while, but in the end, we reach threshold and run out of the ability to maintain the lie…
Our fear of being seen for who we really are holds us back – we fear criticism….so the sooner we accept that we won’t be liked by everyone, the sooner we can be free to be ourselves….and be great!
It’s OK to be you – with your opinions – and your beliefs – not everyone will agree with you, but so what? It doesn’t make you wrong – it’s just a difference of opinion!
Let go of the need to be liked by everyone…because no-body is!…but if people don’t seem to like you, it’s not a reflection on you…it’s just other people’s values and rules are different to yours…and it affects how people perceive you…or perhaps your niceness or your confidence shows up faults they perceive in themselves, so they find it hard to like you or be around you….but be clear, it’s nothing to do with you….it’s their stuff…
Don’t be ashamed to be you…you’re perfect the way you are – your insecurities, lack of confidence, failures….they make you who you are, and the very fact that you strive to be more, makes you an incredible inspiration to others
Being you, allows you to show your passion….people love you for being you because when you’re authentic, your truth and your passion shows through…
You won’t attract everyone. In fact it may be a small percentage of people you attract. But when you’re ‘you’, you’ll attract the right people who will become your raving fans, your friends and they’ll stick with you for the long term.
How much nicer to build a business and a life around being authentically you.
So don’t be scared to say how it is for you…if you write blogs, broadcasts – be honest – people love stories…
I speak from my heart….I tell people how it really is for me. On occasion I could cringe at some of the things that come out of my mouth – and I do! But it doesn’t last…I realise it’s me – take it or leave it. I’m not perfect and I don’t claim to be, but I’ve learnt some things and if you can take value from them, then that’s all I want.
When you’re authentic, it’s much easier to build rapport – you’re openly sharing your pains, your failures, your breakthroughs, your successes – & people relate to that.
Don’t try to be guru, be real – there’s no passion, emotion in that guru talk – it’s so ‘samey’. People want real people someone they can relate to…a juicy story! That’s why people read the gossip mags….think about it! People want to know about other people’s pain…and they want to know how to break through. People are looking for leadership….for people who will take them where they want to go…if you’re real from the start….you can be that storyteller and that leader…
Let me tell you, when people applaud you for being you…that’s a whole new level of empowerment…
We don’t need to change everybody’s life – but be you, so that the people who need exactly you can have you.
It’s pretty hard not to be attracted to someone who is raw, and real, who tells great stories and is prepared to give an account with honesty and who gives you their failures and their insecurities…people want to know they’re not alone in their struggles and if you can be that person who’s struggled too, but who has found a way through, then your value to them is huge – you’ll have their undivided attention.
Everybody loves a come back kid – the people who hit rock bottom, totally failed, & they come back through adversity, they find a new way and they triumph! – it’s the theme of practically every Hollywood Blockbuster!
It’s OK to make mistakes – failing means you tried, and trying is success in my book! No-one was ever successful without failing along the way.
Honesty & truth is such a reassuring place to come from…what I say today will be what I said last week or next week – because it’s my truth. If you relate then come join me, if not, that’s fine too.
When you are yourself, you can just say it as it is for you…you can let go of the response from others – no beating yourself up, or blaming about what you should or shouldn’t have said. You are calm and own yourself
Get clear about YOUR values and what YOU stand for. When you keep consistency in your message you build trust – people will know what you stand for and can trust that you will do as you say, and say what you mean.
We all have life experience which is of value to others, and probably will affect what you feel strongly about. So give that value from your own experiences to others – you may not always know who you are helping, but I assure you someone life has changed because of what you’ve shared.
Being you makes you unique in the market place – don’t blend into the 1,000’s – stand out in the crowd – what makes you different and how you can relate that to others like you
Be YOU and then you’ll attract other people like you – and having people like you as clients or on your team is much more fun than people you have nothing in common with or even, who you don’t really like!
Focus on your qualities always – what are you good at? If your friends were asked what’s great about you, what would they say? Then use those personality traits to your advantage.
You were born to be great so let me ask you this – why be a second rate version of somebody else, when you can step into your authentic self, let go of fear, let your passion shine through and become a first rate version of you!